i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
