I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize