you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
