let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize