And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize