apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
