lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
