woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
