How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
