walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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