margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
