so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
