honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize