A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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