kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
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