Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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