Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize