Having a random hookup so left but love u
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
