worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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