her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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