DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
