I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
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