finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
