Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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