Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
