It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
