we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
