how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
