I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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