Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
