Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
