It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize