Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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