i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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