Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
