Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
