Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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