I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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