The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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