Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
