i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
