He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize