i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
