EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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