so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
