I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
