you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
What a dumb baby whore.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
