Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize