No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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