I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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