something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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